IT IS WHAT IT IS

So many people have asked why the house is full of stuff and want to know why. What happened to the previous owners? Why has it sat empty? So many questions. I thought I would take a minute to answer them all here in one single blog post rather than having to repeat the same things over and over in private messages and as comments.

First, I want to say that the previous owners are not out there on social media sites. They don’t share their lives all over the internet, so out of courtesy and respect to them, I will not use their full names, and will only be referring to them as Mr. and Mrs. K. Locals who know who they are, I would ask you for the same respect. While some people are fine with sharing every meal they have, photos of their babies, duck- lipped selfies or videos of cats with the world, others are not, and that should be respected.

With that being said, they do feel some guilt about letting the house get to the state it is in, but once I tell the tale, maybe you all who have been a bit judgmental about it will be more understanding.

They lived there as a family, through good times and bad, and a lot of love filled that house at one time. Flint knappers would gather there to chip out new points, sharing stories, newly fashioned arrow heads, drink and camaraderie. Extended family would visit for meals and laughter. Friends would stop in for coffee and conversation. All normal everyday life. Well, except the majority of us don’t have a bunch of rowdy flint knappers, the rowdiest ones being from from Missouri I might add, as they are friends of mine as well, drinking moonshine and banging rocks in our house, but you get my drift.

When Mrs. K was going through chemotherapy treatments and was so weak she could hardly walk, Mr. K put the Christmas tree out on the roof of the front porch so she could see it from her bedroom window. This may be a tradition we keep there, because it is such a symbol of love and affection, and all part of the history of the house.

One of the larger bedrooms housed Mrs. K’s daughter and grandson, and later her new husband for awhile until they moved into their own place. Unfortunately, her daughter was killed in a tragic car accident, and when I walked through the house with Mrs. K, you could feel both the hurt and the love. My heart broke for her as we walked through a room and she saw her daughter’s old prom dress hanging in a corner. She literally gasped. It is tough for her emotionally to be there, in that place she once shared with a child she will never be able to hold again on this earth. As a mother, that is a pain I have had the luxury of never knowing, and I cannot imagine how hard it must be to live with.

About 10 years ago, Mr. K’s mother, who lived in Cuba, NY needed care. Rather than stick her in a nursing home, and because she was not able to walk the steps of the Renwick House, they moved in with her. They simply walked out one day to care for a family member. There wasn’t room for their things at his mother’s house, so they just left it all as it was.

Time went on and life just happens. Trust me, I know. I try to never make plans, because every single day something else just comes up that needs to be dealt with, and other things get put on the back burner. It happens. As I sit here looking at a sweater I started for myself over 3 years ago that I am finally finishing, I understand.

So that’s it. No Amityville Horror type story of a family that fled in the middle of the night to escape evil demons. No serial killer came in, slashing his way through the house. No UFO abductions. No Bigfoot. Just a simple story of a family and love.

A quote that comes to mind in this instance is “Some people are always finding fault with Nature for putting thorns on roses; I always thank her for having put roses on thorns.” Unfortunately, I am unsure of who actually said that first, as it is credited to many different people in one form or another. So rather than judging Mr. & Mrs. K for how the house may look now, let us remember one thing. They have given someone else the opportunity to work on it and fix it. Be thankful for that. I know I am.

A sign on one of the doors in the house reads “It is what it is”. One of my favorite lines. We cannot change the past or how things are. We can only change the future. As much as I would love to look out my window and see a Blue Police Call Box show up on my lawn, with a light flashing on top and Dr. Who inside coming to take me away to change the past, (and while I am fantasizing, I may as well make it the David Tennent incarnation of the Doctor because he was my favorite), it is what it is. Let us not wish it were different. Let us look at what we can do to fix it from here on.

I can assure you that when the time comes, you will never look back on your life and regret not having mowed your lawn more, or weeded the flowerbeds more. Yes, you may regret not having patched a hole in your roof, or not having spent more time in one place or another, but there is nothing you will ever regret more than not spending more time with those you love. In the end, that is what really matters. While I get ready to devote a majority of my time working on the projects for the house, I am fortunate enough to know that I will be spending that time with my family and friends, both old a new. All people that I love.